This is one for your partner, spouse, friend or parent. This is to explain that it’s not just about TIDING UP! 

We are all born with certain skills, some can Draw, play an instrument, speak several languages or build things. And some are born with the ability to organise. And some are not. It’s called, The Organising gene. 

I have the ability to look at a space and see its potential. I know where to start and the order in which to do things. I can see if furniture will fit, if we moved it around, without measuring . Awesome I know. This skill can be used to tidy cupboards or organise my day or run an office. I can see what needs to be done and how to get us there the quickest way. 

I have the gene, my mother has the gene. Our teenage son. Maybe not so much. 

Lol

Telling someone who doesn’t possess this “gene” if you will, is like asking me to put up a shelf. (I certainly do not have the builders gene). I mean I’ll have a go but it’s never going to be perfectly straight or exactly in the middle. So I ask my husband, who definitely does have the builder gene. 

I don’t have the skill so I find someone who does. 

And this follows through to organising and tidying. I mean, that person who doesn’t have the gene will have a go. Maybe clear the floor, put things into a Bag for life to do later, move items from one room to another but it never quite gets finished. Not Instagram finished anyway. 

So take this thought and add in a sprinkle of ADD/ADHD. A touch of OCD and maybe a nugget of Depression and see where we are? Things suddenly get more complicated and difficult.

I am not a Psychotherapist but I am observant. 

People who have an ADD/ADHD brain for example, lack this  ability. Not the want, or the drive or the determination, they lack the capability to finish a task. Especially if it’s one that’s boring as hell. So things get started but never quite make it to the finish line. Usually, to the bottom of the stairs or dining room table. 

Now again, add two kids into that mix, a job, kids clubs, house work, dog walks, pets, friends and parents to visit, the list is endless. The list is overwhelming. Suddenly, the task to tidy up isn’t so easy anymore. 

So my whole point to this is. If something is beyond your capabilities. We ask for help. 

Your car breaks down and you don’t know how to fix it or don’t have the time, you call a professional. 

If there is water pouring over the floor, you call a plumber. Yes you probably could do it yourself with a YouTube video, the correct tools and several hours to spare but you don’t, so you call a professional. 

We want life made easier. Calling me is no different. I am a professional. I can do something you can’t, for whatever reason. 

But it’s the stigma that has become attached to my profession that has made many people feel stuck. They have become embarrassed and ashamed because they can’t do the things that everyone else manages to do, with apparent ease. This task has attracted a very flippant and derogatory term…

“Just TIDY up”. 

If you are saying these words to someone, I challenge you- “JUST go and Build a house. JUST go and change the engine in your car, JUST go and paint the Sistine chapel. 

Easy to the people who do these things not so easy for you if you don’t know how. 

So In conclusion, if you know someone who needs my help please don’t diminish their needs or feelings. Don’t insinuate they are useless or lazy or stupid, just let them figure out what they need and how to find the person that can help them. 

If your loved one confided in you that they wanted to speak to a councillor, you would encourage them to do so. Asking and paying for my help is no different. I just don’t have letters before my name. But the desired outcome is the same. Liberation, peace and relief. 

“Just tidy up”. 

If only everything in life was that simple. 

You are awesome. 

Chloë x